One of the first things I did when I returned home was buy some new cloths. Mostly because I was cold. I came from a very tropical environment and Oregon is cold, at least for now. I have always enjoyed new cloths but I want to be practical and get what I need not just what I want.
My main priority is to find a job. This is where the majority of my time is spent these days. I have had a few interviews but no job yet. I need a job before I can decide where I will live and before I buy a car. My parents are great, giving me a place to live and they let me use their car whenever I need. I really have to force myself to be patient because I consider myself a very decisive person. I like to make a decision and take action. For now I need to wait on moving on until I get a job. I am working on living in the present moment and enjoying the simple things. Like hot water that comes out of the sink, driving a car, and of course being able to flush my toilet paper (sorry if that is too much information).
Honestly, sometimes when I think about rebuilding not only my life but a home it is a little bit daunting. But my goal is to keep it as simple as possible. To not be afraid to get what I need, but I don't want to go back to what I had. Which was cupboards full of things I might use one day but really never used. Last week my sister gave me her Goodwill pile which was a pan, some coffee cups and 3 wooden spoons. I was so happy to get that. So now I have a little pile started which awaits my new home.
I think one of the hardest things is rebuilding the relationships in my life. Someone said to me the other day, "we got use to you being away." Which is the reality in life, people and life move on. I know some relationships will withstand the 4 years of me being gone and some I will cherish for what they were and be grateful for the moments I had in those relationships. Soon I will also be making new relationships which is exciting.
One thing I learned from working on the construction project in Brazil is that rebuilding comes with both challenges and advances. It always takes a little longer than we want and there are surprises along the way. But rebuilding is about new beginnings, hope for a better future, and dreaming of creating something wonderful. In so many of my job applications or interviews I am asked what my goals are. Of course I share the goals that are appropriate for the given job. But my ultimate goal is to live a mindful life full of joy, love, and simplicity. I want to live this journey of life with grace, solidarity, and always looking to new possibilities.
